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Heli JOKES for Rainy Days...!
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G Steyn
Wed Sep 08 2010, 12:11AM


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Registered Member #1458
Joined: Thu Jan 03 2008, 10:28AM
Posts: 2092
Woman Drivers - Nataniel



Vanoggend terwyl ek (minding my own business-as men normally do) op die snelweg ry, kyk ek oor my skouer en sien 'n vrou hier langs my ... in 'n splinternuwe Polo, met haar gesig tot teenaan die tru-spieëltjie gedruk, besig om maskara aan te sit.

Kan jy dit glo?
Ek het net vir 'n paar sekondes weggekyk, maar toe ek my weer kon kry, is sy halfpad oor in my baan, nog steeds besig met haar blerrie maskara.

Nou kyk, as 'n man skrik ek normaalweg nie maklik nie. Maar die vroumens het my so die horries gegee dat ek my elektriese skeermes uit my hand laat val het, wat op sy beurt die "Steak & Kidney pie" uit my ander hand laat glip het en 'n gemors op die "gearlever" laat los het.
In die hele deurmekaarspul - terwyl ek die kar probeer stuur met my knieë -glip die selfoon toe weg van my oor, drop in die vuurwarm Wimpy koffie tussen my bene, verbrand vir grootseun en die tweeling dat ek gil van pyn en natuurlik my sigaret voor in my hemp laat val.

Die gevolg: my selfoon in sy moer, my broek papnat, my nasaat masjien uit aksie vir wie weet hoe lank, my beste hemp vol gate gebrand en ek het boonop 'n belangrike oorsese oproep verloor.

Blerrie vroumens- bestuurders......... ...........


RC helicopters aren't a matter of life or DEATH...

They're far MORE important than that!
OB_Scorpio
Fri Sep 10 2010, 12:23PM


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Registered Member #1409
Joined: Thu Nov 01 2007, 01:34PM
Posts: 1756
It's not difficult to make a woman happy.
A man only needs to be:

1. a friend
2. a companion
3. a lover
4. a brother
5. a father
6. a master
7. a chef
8. an electrician
9. a carpenter
10. a plumber
11. a mechanic
12. a decorator
13. a stylist
14. a sexologist
15. a gyneacologist
16. a psychologist
17. a pest exterminator
18. a psychiatrist
19. a healer
20. a good listener
21. an organizer
22. a good father
23. very clean
24. sympathetic
25. athletic
26. warm
27. attentive
28. gallant
29. intelligent
30. funny
31. creative
32. tender
33. strong
34. understanding
35. tolerant
36. prudent
37. ambitious
38. capable
39. courageous
40. determined
41. true
42. dependable
43. passionate
44. compassionate

WITHO UT FORGETTING TO:

45. give her compliments regularly
46. love shopping
47. be honest
48. be very rich
49 not stress her out
50. not look at other girls

AND AT THE SAME TIME, YOU MUST ALSO:

51. give her lots of attention, but expect little yourself
52.. give her lots of time, especially time for herself
53. give her lots of space, never worrying about where she goes

IT IS VERY IMPORTANT:

54. Never to forget:
* birthdays
* anniversaries
* arrangements she makes

HOW TO MAKE A MAN HAPPY

1. Show up naked
2. Bring alcohol

. . . Come to the dark side, we have cookies there.:D


˙uʍop ǝpısdn ʎlɟ plnoɔ ı ɥsıʍ ı
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